Hallelujah, and pass the vitamins…

Scene, at dinner, Dad scooping up his third helping of salad (a riff on the flavors in this one),  starts engaging in the little game I call “Deconstruct Dinner.”  He gets mad if I just tell him the ingredient list; he wants to guess, even though half the stuff I serve him sometimes gets the “What the hell is this?” fisheye.

Dad:  This is good.  This is what?  Beets?  Chicken.  Quinoa (pronounced Kin-oh-Ah, because he likes the way I twitch when he does that).

Me: (Nodding.  Trying not to twitch.)

Dad:  The dressing’s what, dill?  Mustard?  Some other green herby thing?

Me:  Parsley, sherry vinegar, olive oil, salt.

Dad:  And that schmancy Rhode Island feta, Narraganset bay, psah.

Me:  (Words to the effect of step off of my cheese, this shit is first quality feta, bitches, I got 99 problems, but sourcing a local hormone-free feta ain’t one.)

Dad:  (rolling his eyes at my vehement defense of the ass-pensive cheese) Scallions?

Me:  (Nodding, chewing my delicious organic salad, making generally assenting noises.)

Dad:  Did you cook the quinoa in chicken broth?  It’s tasty.

Me:  I did.  (Twitch.)

Dad:  And this is what, spinach?  It’s not baby spinach.

Me:  It’s baby kale.  (Victoriously spears a leaf with a beet and some dressing, munches at the minerally goodness.)

Dad gives the whole plate the fisheye.  Takes another bite.  Chews.  Takes another bite, then picks a leaf up with his finger.

Dad:  Hallelujah, and praise the baby kale!  Pass the beta carotene!

Me:  Crucifers.  Vitamin C, K, calcium, lots of carotenoids.

Dad:  Bless these crucifers, lord, and praise the vitamins!  Thanks be for the baby kale in-store discount!  (Stabs the last piece of kale with his fork.  A beat passes.)  Can you make crispy salt & vinegar kale with this, too?

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1 thought on “Hallelujah, and pass the vitamins…

  1. braineatsbrain

    I’m so happy that you got the hormone free feta situation well in hand. That can be tricky 😀

    I loved this. It almost made me want to cook again. Almost 😉

    (Sure does sound tasty though!)

    Reply

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